For Three seconds...

This is something that had happened more than a month ago...

I was able to meet the guy I loved from five years ago. The topic of my every entry on my high school diary.. the one I always look to.. the one I always wanted to be with.. the one I've been loving until last year.. True, I am no longer head-over-heels in love with this guy. It's been for so long that I'm holding all my love for him that I finally decided to loosen the grip for something that I can no longer have.

I had stopped waiting.

I had stopped hoping.

I had stopped from always thinking about him...

But... I still have our memories written on my stocked notebooks at one corner of my room. I can still vividly recall all the things that happened between us. I know he still has a seat locked within my heart... Because I onced loved him... he is that important to me until now.

So when I finally got the chance to have a glimpse of him, even for a while... at that time, I don't know why I suddenly ran... I've got to look at him only for about 3 seconds. I hurriedly ran towards the doors of PRC, with no attempts of looking back. It was a sudden reflex on my part so I, too, don't know why exactly did I ran... After cooling down myself for quite a while, lots of I-should-have-done-this-and-that statements flooded onto my mind... As if I lost this chance that I should have grabbed...

I still love him, but not as strong as I loved him before--- it is something that I had found from my last year's diary entries..

Yes, maybe the love that I had for him is still there within me.  Maybe I am still missing this guy... But since I already had accepted the facts of the life that we are facing now, I have to locked all those feelings that had remained... Without knowing for sure if I'll be given the chance to let it go again or I can never will...